he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Randomize
