1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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