it's like iHOP with fire
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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