Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
