you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
she smelled like a LAN party
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Randomize
