Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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