Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
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