BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
