North Korea, Best Korea!
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize