I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I need moral support for this bender
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
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