When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
