i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
