the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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