HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
