If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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