is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Randomize