My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
