I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
