well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
