Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
