She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize