I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
