My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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