it wasn't lemon gatorade
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
