More tranny stories later!
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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