Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Randomize
