so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
