your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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