she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize
