Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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