Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize