@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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