I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize