they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
