i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
