yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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