: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
