i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
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