I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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