i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
and i looked up. we had an audience...
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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