you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
