That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
