the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
