super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize