god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Randomize