white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
