i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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