I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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