How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize