This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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