just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Randomize
