He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I would ride that face into the sunset
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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